When nature calls

So by now, I’m running late. And I’m running late on a country road, which means there’s no gas station or shop with a loo.

Finally I see a pub and stop…but at 6 minutes past three, the staff is 6 minutes gone for the afternoon break, which lasts until 6 p.m. So I do what any good world traveler would do: Head for the nearest bush.

I take a good look around. No brambles. No poison ivy. No snakes.

What I don’t realize – at first – is that the innocent-looking leafy plant beneath me is a Scottish nettle, part of the thistle family. And its leaves carry a nasty, nasty sting.

Two showers and six hours later, the backs of my thighs still burn.

Let’s blame it on Mapquest. And hope it settles by tomorrow.